Six lines
On May 25, 1961, President John F. Kennedy announced before a special joint session of Congress the dramatic and ambitious goal of sending an American safely to the Moon before the end of the decade.
At the time, the Russians were winning the space race. The U.S. needed a goal; something to aim for, both figuratively and literally. JFK set the goal nine years out to give the space program life… to tell the world that this is what we are going to do.
In 1969, Apollo 11 commander Neil Armstrong was the first astronaut in the world to set foot on the lunar surface.
You can’t reach a goal unless you set one.
This year, in January, I approached my group of writer friends with a proposal: let’s set our goals together, publicly within our group. I needed a target.
My list was short: only 6 lines.
1) Win a VOTY in 2014.
2) Be chosen for a spot in the HerStories friendship anthology
3) Choose a direction for a novel and get at least half done before the end of this year.
4) Get a children's book published
5) Go to the gym 2x a week and fit into my clothes better
6) Be published on Brain, Child
7) Submit an essay to Precipic
Each goal looked like a small mountain; in fact, the very first goal was one I saw as a major stretch. Last year, when I sat in the audience at BlogHer and listened to Adrienne Jones, Ann Imig, and Kelly Wickham as they made me laugh and cry, I knew that I wanted to be up there, too. I didn’t think for a second it would happen a year later.
When I got the message that one of my essays had been chosen as a BlogHer Voice of the Year, I picked up my son and twirled him around. Out of 2,500 essays, they picked mine as an honoree. And what was even more amazing to me was that it had been chosen to be one of twelve to be read on stage at the annual conference. I had purchased a ticket with hope in my heart, but I wasn’t at all sure I could swing the trip without a good excuse. It was a thrilling moment, and my friends online were incredibly supportive and shared my celebration from the moment it was announced.
Last year was the first time that I had attended BlogHer, and I loved it. When I walked into the hotel lobby, the first person I spotted was Lizz Porter of Am I a Funny Girl? I walked right up to her and gave her a bear hug. She’s a hugger, see, so she didn’t mind. That one hug set the tone for two days of connection with people I never knew I needed. But I do.
This year, I walked in feeling confident and excited. Maybe a little too excited, because my nerves were on high alert on Friday before my on-stage reading. I dropped several things in the room while getting ready, because my hands were shaking. During the day, I know I was more distracted than usual, and I’m sure I missed out on meeting some wonderful people because I was stuck in my own head. Luckily, my friends rallied around me and walked me through it all.
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| Support system: Top row: Kristin, Angela, and Greta Middle row: Jennie, Arnebya, and Tonya Bottom: Elaine, Jennifer, Katie, Leigh Ann, and Poppy Photo by Elaine Alguire |
Backstage during the Voice of the Year presentation, I got to meet some amazing women that I have admired from afar, and it is a privilege to now call them friends. Their stories were riveting and beautifully crafted. Their photos were haunting and gorgeous. And when I took the stage to read mine, I started out fast and then remembered how I had practiced it, and eased into a rhythm. I worked hard to keep my own tears in check.
The women themselves lined up to hug each speaker after her time on stage, and the support and love was tremendous. Women, catty? Not there. Not anywhere that I saw. In fact, maybe it’s the company I keep, but I met scores of talented and beautiful and sweet women (and one man, Neil Kramer, who has the most amazing Instagram account).
The exhilaration of reaching this goal feels so good, and last week, when Scary Mommy published my essay on her site, more than 30,000 people shared it. Perhaps it struck a nerve.
This is what my goals list looks like now:
1) Win a VOTY in 2014 – Check!
2) Be chosen for a spot in the HerStories friendship anthology – Check!
3) Choose a direction for my novel and get at least half done before the end of this year – in progress
4) Get a children's book published – Scheduled for fall 2014
5) Go to the gym 2x a week and fit into my clothes better – well...
6) Be published on Brain, Child – Check!
7) Submit to Precipice – Check! And chosen for a spot in the book to be published this fall
It’s time to create some new goals.
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| Jamie and Casey - new friends. Amazing women. |
So much amazing work all in one list.
At the risk of sounding like an Oscar acceptance speech, I want to say thank you to some special people:
Thank you to Leigh Ann for leaving a session early to give me a hug before I left for rehearsal. And my other two roommates, Angela and Greta, who brought gifts and smiles and hugs.
Casey, for the voice of experience and encouragement.
To my tribe, for supporting me before, during, and after the event.
Kate, Sarah, and Stephanie, who gave me their precious time to rehearse via FaceTime.
Jamie and Jill and Kim, who went out of their way to find and meet me.
All of the other VOTY winners, plus Elisa and Alexandra and Rita.
All of you, who cheered me on. Thank you.
Love,
