Finding Beauty

Beautiful in my eyes

What do the words ugly and beauty mean to you?  Over time, scientists, psychologists, and others have tried to figure out what it is about certain people that makes them beautiful by common standards.  In the Western world, it is most often symmetry - balanced, pleasing facial features.  But the studies are inconclusive at best. On the flip side, ugly includes things and people we find abhorrent. 

 




Ugly

1: frightful, dire

2a : offensive to the sight : hideous

b : offensive or unpleasant to any sense

3: morally offensive or objectionable

4: surly, quarrelsome; ugly disposition

Beauty

1: the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit : loveliness

2: a beautiful person or thing; especially : a beautiful woman

3: a particularly graceful, ornamental, or excellent quality

4: a brilliant, extreme, or egregious example or instance

(Source:  Merriam-Webster) 

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.  - Confucius

Graffiti or art?

I'm no scientist, and I don't know why some are considered beautiful in appearance over others.   Have you ever met someone you admired only to discover his personality is so distasteful that it affects how you see him from that day forward?  It feels like a loss to no longer see the beauty you once perceived.  Or perhaps there is someone you hadn't noticed before who does something thoughtful or impresses you with her intellect and she becomes more beautiful in your eyes.  My son's face is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen; I wish every child in the world had a mother who felt this way.

What I do know is this:

Ugly is... a person who is distracted and rude.

            ... prejudice and discrimination.

            ... calling someone a hateful nickname.

            ... disliking someone because of his or her religion.
            ... writing cruel words anonymously on a stranger's web site.

            ... lying and cheating
            ... negativity and jealousy.

Beauty is... someone who makes eye contact and listens when you speak.

               ... a loving hug from a child.

               ... standing up for what you believe in.

               ... being there for someone who needs you.

               ... reaching out and making an effort.
               ... taking responsibility.  
               ... acceptance of people who are different from you
               ... giving your time and resources to help others.
               ... time with a loved one.

Ugly is inextricably linked to hate, meanness, and bigotry.

Beautiful is sharing, love, and hope.

Are you practicing beauty?  It's the element in our lives that makes it wonderful.  Remove the ugly from your lives; that may mean letting go of toxic relationships, environment, jobs, and habits.  For me, reading posts from upbeat, positive people online adds beauty to my life; I've highlighted two in my last paragraph below.  Surrounding yourself with beauty instead of ugly is worth the effort.

And remember this:  you are beautiful in the eyes of the people who love you.  Let go of the insecurities, the wonder if you are enough, and the worry.   You are doing beautiful things with your beautiful life.